The countdown is over, and the day has finally arrived: it’s time for the first phone call home!

As a parent, you’ve probably been waiting by the phone, eager to hear all about your son’s adventures, the new friends he’s making, and the skills he’s learning. However, we want to let you in on a little camp secret. That first phone call can sometimes be surprisingly emotional; and not just for you.

It is incredibly common for campers to get upset on the phone. What surprises many parents is that this happens even with campers who are perfectly well-adjusted, thriving in their cabins, and having a blast. Even returning campers who know the ropes can suddenly struggle when they hear Mom or Dad’s voice.

Why does this happen? Hearing your voice is a sudden, stark reminder of home. It safely opens the emotional floodgates, allowing them to release any lingering homesickness they’ve been bravely pushing aside while having fun. To help you navigate this milestone, we’ve put together a few tips, skills, and insights for that first call:

1. Stay Calm and Come Prepared

Your camper will feed off your energy. If you sound anxious, they will feel anxious. Pick up the phone with a warm, calm, and upbeat tone. It helps to have a mental list of specific topics ready to talk about so there isn’t any awkward silence. Ask about the big events, like College War, or ask what their favorite new activity has been so far. You can even ask about daily routines, like how they are navigating the dining hall and what their favorite camp meal is.

2. Avoid the “Interrogation” Trap

When we miss our kids, we want to know everything. But rapid-fire questions can feel overwhelming to a camper. Try to refrain from peppering them with questions. Instead, lean into open-ended questions that invite them to tell a story. Instead of asking, “Are you making friends?”, try, “Who do you sit next to at lunch?” or “What’s the funniest thing that happened in the cabin today?”

3. If They Cry, Validate (Don’t Fix)

If your son gets upset on the phone, your parental instinct will immediately scream at you to fix the problem. Resist this urge. You cannot fix homesickness over the phone, and trying to bargain or solve the issue often makes it worse. Instead, just listen and validate his feelings. Repeat what he is saying back to him. If he says, “I miss you and I want to come home,” you can say, “I know you miss us, and it’s okay to feel sad. I am so proud of you for being so brave.” Feeling heard is usually exactly what they need.

4. Remember the “Hang Up and Play” Phenomenon

This is the most important thing for parents to know: those tears are almost always temporary. We see it every single summer. A camper will be crying on the phone with their parents, say their goodbyes, and within sixty seconds of hanging up, they are running across the lawn, laughing, and throwing a frisbee with their cabinmates. They get it out of their system, and they move on.

No News is Good News

It can be incredibly hard to hang up the phone when your child is upset, but please find comfort in our camp partnership. If your son’s sadness is not temporary, and he continues to struggle after the phone call ends, you will hear from us. We are constantly monitoring your camper’s well-being. If we aren’t calling you, it means he is out having fun!

Enjoy catching up with your campers, and remember…you are giving them the most incredible gift of boyhood!